As seen in a dog’s diary:
8am – Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9am – Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
10am – Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
11am – Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
Noon – Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
1pm – Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
2pm – Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
3pm – Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
4pm – Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5pm – Oh boy! Mom! My favorite!
7pm – Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
9pm – Oh boy! Sleeping in Master's bed! My favorite!
As Seen In A Cat's Diary:
9am – Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
10am – Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
11am – Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
Noon – Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
1pm – Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
2pm – Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
3pm – Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
4pm – Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5pm – Oh boy! Mom! My favorite!
7pm – Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
9pm – Oh boy! Sleeping in Master's bed! My favorite!
As Seen In A Cat's Diary:
Day 198 of my captivity . . . . My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded – must try this at the TOP of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair – must try this on their bed.
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a "good little cat" I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices; I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. However, I can wait; it is only a matter of time . . . .
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded – must try this at the TOP of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair – must try this on their bed.
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a "good little cat" I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices; I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. However, I can wait; it is only a matter of time . . . .
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